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Quit or Persevere

1/21/2015

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Before becoming a Christian, whether to quit something was not a tough dilemma for me. If it did not work, QUIT! If it became too complicated, QUIT! If it did not make sense, QUIT! If it were slow coming about, QUIT! If it appeared as if obstacles were always in my way, QUIT! No big deal ... no worries ... no struggles! Easy solution but also why I never really went anywhere in life or accomplished much. Quitters never move from the spot they are on or ever really find out what they are made of.  

Today, as a Christian, I pray about the situation ... I seek His design for my life ... I persevere because I know that the more He wants it for me, the more the enemy will attack. Now, however, as I deal with a situation, I can honestly say I do not know whether to quit or persevere. I am in unfamiliar waters and it is very unsettling.  

When I started this venture, I was so excited and determined. I wanted it very much. Things started out well and I was growing in more ways than one. Then, it all seemed to take a turn for the worse. Obstacles are repeatedly in my way and it is making me very discouraged. Are these obstacles from God because this is not part of His plan for me? OR, are the obstacles from the enemy so I do become disillusioned and quit? I cannot seem to find peace on either level.  

I do know that things are slowly unravelling. I am very much behind. I am having thoughts that are not becoming ... thoughts that are not allowing me to encourage myself. Battles of the mind are difficult enough and I am very much aware of this. We fight mental battles daily, and if we do not learn to cease them at the onset, they can be very destructive. They can eventually take you down if you allow. I struggled greatly in this area of my life as a young Christian. It was very destructive emotionally, physically, and mentally ... not to mention what it does for your relationship with Christ. Today I pretty much know how to fight those battles ... or any battles for that matter ... with the Word of God. There is power in the Word! So, why am I struggling so much now? I simply do not have the answer.  

What do you do when you find yourself in a situation as this? You weigh the pros and cons ... you pray steadfastly ... and you persevere until you know the answer. I know all of this so why am I so unsettled in my spirit over it all?  

I do not mind being behind ... I do not mind the thoughts of others ... I do not mind working twice as hard to achieve this goal. I have learned long ago to press forward no matter how difficult if it is His desire for you, but what I do mind is wasting my time ... His time ... if this is the wrong path. Not to say the monetary waste! It is frustrating, to say the least, and not where I thought I would be after 16 years of walking with Him. I thought times as this were behind me.   

I can only conclude that God has something great for me at the end of this struggle. Now I just need to figure out what the struggle is ... persevering or quitting!

 

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Push Through No Matter What

1/19/2015

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As I left karate last night, I sat in my car and simply cried out, “Thank you, Lord”. I must have said it three or four times and again as I travelled home. I was in awe ... why, I don’t know ... as nothing God does surprises me. He tells us He will do miraculous things ... He tells us that if we perservere we will see His hand upon us ... He tells us that if we do not allow our flesh to control us, He will bless us! Why then when He does it are we left speechless? This was me last night.  

I leave work at 5:00 and then I have an hour of lag time before I have to be at karate. You have to understand that karate is very difficult for me to begin with for numerous reasons, so when something comes up or I do not feel well, talking myself out of going would not be a difficult thing to accomplish. What would be hard is talking myself into going when circumstances are not perfect. Well this was the situation yesterday. I was tired. I was not feeling quite well. I was maybe a bit downtrodden because of things I am dealing with in life. I simply wanted to go home, take a bath to get warm as I was aching through to my bones, and the last thing I wanted was to have to once again get out in the cold, then go in the bathroom and change clothes to begin karate.   

I sat outside of the karate studio in my vehicle and literally spoke to myself out loud. I kept saying over and over, “You can do this. Just get up and go in. It will be fine and you will feel better because of it”. This self-talk is nothing new to me as I do it all the time, but self-talk of an encouraging nature is pretty new. Sure, I have done it a bit here and there over the years, but I am making a conscious effort now to do it routinely for numerous reasons. Believe me when I say it does make a difference. There is life to the words we speak. We can either speak negative into our lives or we can choose to speak positive. The same is true of our thought life ... we can think positive things or we can think negative things. We do have control over the things we allow into our minds. I am focusing on speaking more positive this year in an effort to overcome. Last night was a sure fire victory in this category!!! Praise God!  

As you can assume by now, I did attend karate. I mentally overcame my flesh and pushed through. It took EVERYTHING I had mentally and physically to do it, but once I was in there I was glad. Not overly excited, but peaceful. Throughout the course of the night, Master pushed us to our limits as always. You leave there feeling invigorated and so alive. Tonight was no different in that area, but God blessed me in a much more profound way also.   

As most of you are aware of by now, I have written a book about a dark time in my life. I had hoped to have it published and out there over a year ago, but I hit some roadblocks I have not personally been able to overcome. Feeling very frustrated and discouraged at times, I finally just put it in God’s hands where it should have been all the time. We mortals have to go around the same mountains so many times to realize the outcome is only the same before we finally surrender and give it to the One who can bless it if it is His will for us. I am no different! Putting it in God’s hands has been a bit trying for me also because He has not worked as quickly as I thought He should have. Hence, I stepped up my praying efforts in this regard. I began questioning so many things I thought He shared with me long ago. Foolish acts I realize, but again I am only a mere mortal. What other excuse could I use?  

Master was speaking to us last night about goals and goal setting. In the course of this conversation, he asked me what was a goal I had. I, of course, responded, “Getting my book published”. No sooner had I spoken this when things changed for me. Master responded with, “Great, I can help you with that goal. Friend me on Facebook and I am going to hook you up with a lady who does just that. She is a wonderful person and you will really like her”. Well, my friend, you could have cut all the lights out in the room and my face would have been enough light to eluminate the entire building. Later my sister would tell me that she wanted to celebrate with me at that moment, but we were in karate and expected to maintain a level of respectibility. I, too, was having difficulty with not shouting and singing hallelujah right then and there. I was praising God in my mind as loud as you can imagine, and when I finally reached my vehicle, I let it out.  

Then as I sat there I thought how I came so close to missing this miracle. That is right ... I said ‘miracle’ because that is exactly what this is for me. As I pondered how I tried so hard to talk myself out of NOT going to karate, I could feel this sick feeling arising in the pit of my gut. I had to ask myself, “How many other blessings have you lost because you did not perservere past circumstances, fleshly moanings, or whatever?” I do not even want to know the answer to that question. But, my friend, I can tell you this .. if at all possible, I will not miss any future blessings because perserverance is at the top of my list during this upcoming 2015!!! I pray the same for you.

 

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In Christ I Am Stronger Than My Addictions

1/11/2015

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Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.  (Romans 8:37)  

Addictions come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. When people think of addictions, or hear the word ‘addictions’, they automatically think of drugs, alcohol, gambling, tobacco, or a chemical of sorts. We fool ourselves when we limit what we define as addictions. The realm of addictions greatly surpasses a chemical dependency. People can be addicted to other people ... addicted to shopping ... addicted to relationships ... addicted to television, games, music ... the list is endless. We fool ourselves sometimes when we limit the reality of what an addiction can be.  

In praying for revelation in preparation for this article, God laid upon my heart two specific individuals from the Bible ... both of whom had addictions. The first was David. If you study the life of David, he was a popular and mighty king of Israel. As a young lad he was a musician, anointed king by the prophet Samuel. He was a mighty warrior and accomplished great things. Then, he became addicted with lust and had eyes only for Bathsheba. Understand that this was a man of God. It is a prime example of someone who took his eyes off of God and allowed lust to fill his heart. In his determination to obtain Bathsheba for his own, he plotted to commit murder. What extremes our addictions will take us to if allowed. He finally found his way back, but only after great consequences. He repented and God would later describe David as a man after God’s own heart.   

The second person God laid on my heart was a bit puzzling to me. I thought, “Really, God? What addiction did he have?” This person is Jonah and his addiction was extremely different than David’s. Jonah was addicted to having his own way. God wanted Jonah to go to Nineveh and help them repent. Jonah had a different mindset and went to great lengths to not do as God instructed. He did not feel the people of Nineveh were worth the effort; thus, he did not want to do as God desired. God had to take extreme measures to get Jonah back on track.   

Two addictions but neither had a chemical dependency. Both dangerous and very destructive. As with chemical dependencies both had serious withdrawals and consequences. They also effected more than the individuals addicted, which all addictions do. Both David and Jonah could only overcome through the persistent love of Christ and realizing that through Christ we are more than conquerors.  

Questions:  

1. Name some other individuals in the Bible who suffered with addictions;
2. How did they overcome;
3. What consequences did they pay for their addictions; and
4. Who else suffered as a result of their addictions.


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Apart from Christ I Can Do Nothing

1/11/2015

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By now everyone knows that when God speaks to me, I share. I am just as overwhelmed today when He does something for me as I was 16 years ago when I first gave my heart to Him. This morning was no different. If it glorifies Him and encourages others, then I do not care how I am perceived.

He is teaching me to be more bold and radical for Him every day.  

I write articles for a ministry entitled iWomen’s Ministries. We have a new study starting tomorrow and I was due to have my first article to them yesterday. Procrastinating as I did (I am a bit ashamed to admit that), I did not have my article ready. Yesterday I ran into my office, put some thought into the subject matter I was to write on, and I was done. I struggled with every little sentence, but I finished it. Zap, it was gone to the ministry. However, I knew as I was preparing the email to the individual that I report to that the article was not right. I said as much to her in the email but I sent it regardless.  

For the next 30 minutes or so, I could not let it go so I sent the ministry another email instructing them not to use the article I had previously sent and I advised them I would send a new article today. For the remainder of the night and into this morning, I could not get it off my mind. I could not figure out why my article did not flow as I am accustomed to them doing. I could not figure out why I could not relate my topic to biblical structure. I have been studying the Word for many years now and there is nothing that is not covered in the Bible.   

I got up this morning after six hours of unsettled sleep to get ready for church. I did not even want to go because I felt as if I were sleepwalking, but after my experience with karate this past week, I was not about to give in and stay home. God could have another blessing prepared for me and I was not going to miss out. Well, lo and behold, it was shortly after I came to this conclusion that my article I needed to write today just flowed through my mind. I was flabbergasted ... I was speechless ... I was amazed AGAIN at God’s faithfulness to reveal and teach.  

You see I wrote that first article without Christ’s input. I did not pray and ask for Holy Spirit discernment and guidance. Yes, it was a good article ... for a medical paper or something but not for a Bible study. Then, as God laid out for me the individuals from the Bible I was to use for my article ... well, let’s just say that I cannot even make you perceive my emotions. Conclusion ... apart from Christ I can do nothing. What I do on my own may turn out ok ... it may work ... but it will never be as blessed and prosperous as what He can do through me if I allow Him to.  

I was discussing all of this with my son and husband this morning, and then another revelation came to me. I said, “God, you have showed yourself to me so much in the past few weeks. If this is how You are going to be the remainder of the year, then I have a powerful year ahead of me. Why, God?” His response, “You have been diligently seeking me more in the past few weeks than you have been doing in the past ... through prayer, meditation, Bible reading, church attendance, etc.” I am never far from God but I got slack on spending quality time with him ... seeking Him through His Word ... asking His design for my days! God never lies and He said to seek Him and you will find Him!!!! What lessons we learn if we are only open to them.  

Seek Him today and allow Him to flow through you. It is so mind boggling and earth shattering that you will never turn back. He loves you so much.

 

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